Oct 24 2007
Mommy First
I walked into the nursery the other morning and was struck by what I saw. It didn’t surprise me, as it has been a common sight in our home for about a decade. It did suddenly strike me for some reason, that there was my wife, nursing our nine month old son with our three year old daughter snuggled into her side. This is what she is here for. This is her role and her goal. A feminist might be offended by this observation but I know my wife won’t be.
I don’t know why things occur to me when they do. I don’t know why, after fourteen years of marriage and six children (five living and one miscarried,) I suddenly have a flash understanding with respect to my wife. She is a mommy first. I knew that but I guess I had never given it enough thought.
We have really good kids, which I think is a reflection of my wife. They have their most important need met, in abundance, by my wife. The love they receive from their mom is natural, yet amazing. All children deserve this magnitude of love and care. My children are very fortunate to receive it. I, as a father am very fortunate to have my children so loved.
Our oldest three are home-schooled by my wife and they help out with the younger two. They are being taught so well and learning such important lessons. They serve on the altar every Saturday evening at mass. They all wanted very much to do this. They receive an allowance for chores they each perform. This allowance and all money they receive is divided equally between savings, spending, and charity. They decide when to donate their charity money and to what cause. They learn compassion and sacrificial concern by example and by their own activities.
This is my wife fulfilling her purpose in life. She takes responsibility for the well-being of our entire family… usually one-handed since the other arm is holding a baby. I can’t imagine a person being happier in his or her work than my wife is in hers. She is serving her purpose. She is a mommy first, which is exactly what she always aspired to be.
Feminism was marketed as giving women the right to choose their own path in life. But in practice, it does nothing but attempt to force women to conform to the feminist rules of behavior, which, ironically, are the rules feminists seem to think all men live by. Women are being turned into the worst stereotype of the chauvinist male pig–selfish, self-indulgent, backstabbing, corporate ladder climbing beasts. It is wonderful that your wife has chosen to follow her heart and care for her family first. In my view, that’s a legitimate and honorable path for any person to take.