This is too hilarious not to post. I found it at Iowahawk through Hotair:
Granted, it’s 4 minutes of your life you’ll never get back … but you’ll be laughing.
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Archive for September, 2008
Well, how about a bank robber of 12 banks? That’s who! ABC News is reporting on the sweetest bank robbing crime spree I’ve ever heard of. Just incase you’re new to Sunflower Desert, I’m being sarcastic.
Tough economic times have driven some people to desperate measures, but few are accused of going quite so far as Missouri resident Keith Giammanco.
According to police, Giammanco went on a 10-month bank robbing spree in which he stole a total of around $100,000 from 12 banks in the St. Louis area. The robber earned the nickname “The Boonie Hat Bandit” for the military-style hats he wore. Police say Giammanco did it to provide for his 17-year-old twin daughters.
“He’s my Robin Hood, taking from greedy banks and giving to his daughters who need,” Giammanco’s daughter Elise told “Good Morning America.”
Giammanco, a single dad and private day trader, reportedly fell on hard times when the stock market took a downturn and he became unable to provide for his daughters the way he liked or pay mortgage bills.
“He took the role of mom and dad,” Elise said. “He was working and he was doing laundry.”
Giammanco then turned to a life of crime, police say, by entering banks during regular business hours and slipping the teller a note. He never used a gun.
Well, doesn’t that just about sum it all up? I think if you read between the lines you’ll notice that it’s all Bush’s fault. And those greedy banks? Who do they think they are? I guess they didn’t realize there were 17 year old seniors in high school that needed their money.
Giammanco’s daughters were stunned by the news.
“It must be a mistake. I fell to my knees and cried,” Marissa said.
The twins, who are seniors in high school and were planning to go to college next year, are now coping with life without either parent.
Well, daddy really didn’t plan ahead very well now, did he?
“It’s odd to think that I won’t be able to do anything with my dad outside of a little prison cell for years,” Marissa said. “Both of my parents are gone. What am I going to do?“
Once again, daddy was only thinking of the moment and evidently not planning well for the future.
“Who’s going to be there to walk me down the aisle?” Elise said. “And who’s going to be there when I really need somebody to talk to?”
Giammanco is currently being held in a St. Louis jail and, though police say he confessed to robbing the 12 banks, has yet to enter a plea.
Oh, and let’s not forget, it’s not like daddy even used a gun. I think the liberal media would like for this entire mess to be excused. After all, he meant well.
On a side note, banks really just give money to people who slip them notes and demand it? Seems silly to me. Your thoughts?
Sphere: Related ContentJust when I think the DemonRats can’t possibly top the stupidity of Charley Rangel, Florida Congressman Alcee Hastings goes and proves me wrong:
Rep. Alcee Hastings told an audience of Jewish Democrats Wednesday that they should be wary of Republican VP nominee Sarah Palin because “anybody toting guns and stripping moose don’t care too much about what they do with Jews and blacks.”
“If Sarah Palin isn’t enough of a reason for you to get over whatever your problem is with Barack Obama, then you damn well had better pay attention,” Rep. Alcee Hastings of Florida said at a panel about the shared agenda of Jewish and African-American Democrats Wednesday. Hastings, who is African-American, was explaining what he intended to tell his Jewish constituents about the presidential race. “Anybody toting guns and stripping moose don’t care too much about what they do with Jews and blacks. So, you just think this through,” Hastings added as the room erupted in laughter and applause.
Is it just me, or is that freaking crazy? Winged Hussar at Grizzly Groundswell and Wesley Smith at Secondhand Smoke are finding Congressman Hastings stuck on stupid too.
UPDATE: Scoffery.com has it too.
Sphere: Related ContentThis story is an update to the one about the guy who might lose his eye after being hit in the head with the butt of a shotgun. It also helps bring a little clarity to an otherwise ambiguous story:
COLORADO SPRINGS, Colo.—Colorado Springs authorities are considering more charges against an atheist accused of threatening to behead two women with a knife because they are Christians.
Saturday’s dispute with neighbors ended when another neighbor hit Russell Bowman with the butt of a shotgun.
Police Lt. David Whitlock says Bowman was booked into El Paso County jail Sunday on suspicion of felony menacing. Police have said Bowman might lose his eye because of the blow, but Whitlock said Monday he couldn’t discuss Bowman’s condition.
Police said Monday other charges are possible. The neighbor who hit Bowman was not charged.
As it turns out, I guess the knife wielding fool will lose an eye. That’ll teach him.
Sphere: Related ContentAnd rightly so. :) Strange story, lacking information and poorly written, but humorous nonetheless:
A man who came to the home of two women whom he had threatened to decapitate with a knife received a blow to the head that could cost him an eye, according to Colorado Springs police.
Russell Bowman, who claims to be an atheist, threatened the women because they are Christian on Sept. 8. On Friday, he arrived at their apartment and stood in a hallway, according to a police report.
“Another resident of the apartment retrieved a shotgun and approached Bowman, who was by then walking away. The resident ordered Bowman to put the knife down,” according to the report.
Bowman refused and approached the resident, who hit him with the butt of the shotgun, injuring his eye.
“Bowman was treated at Memorial Hospital where it was determined the injury to the eye was so severe, the eye would need to be surgically removed.”
Police will likely pursue charges of felony menacing against Bowman. Police couldn’t be reached for comment Sunday.
That’s the entire story. I guess the moral of the story would be: When someone holding a shotgun tells you to put the knife down, put the knife down. Either that or, don’t threaten to decapitate people when one of those people has access to a shotgun.
Is it wrong to hope he loses the eye? Just asking.
Sphere: Related ContentSince Wyoming is a small state population wise, it is always exciting to hear someone as brilliant as Justice Scalia was here. Here is just a sample of what he spoke of:
“What gives the Supreme Court the right to announce that the Constitution has changed?” Scalia said.
Scalia went on to predict that the Court’s trend over the last 50 years toward the living Constitution theory will have disastrous results for the nation.
“Don’t think the country has lasted two and a half centuries playing that game,” Scalia said. “We won’t last with this change.”
Supporters of the theory of a living constitution generally believe that the progress of the society should be considered when interpreting key constitutional concepts.
Scalia also took a few questions from the audience, including one about his position on the practice of government taking land through eminent domain.
Another huge event is Sarah Baracuda coming to the state. Well, the Jackson area that is. I guess they are part of the state, the part that has most of the money. 
Palin, the Alaska governor who became Sen. John McCain’s surprise running-mate pick earlier this month, will meet with donors at the Teton Pines Country Club and Resort in Wilson on Sept. 24.
“It’s fair to say the response has already exceeded our expectations,” said Dick Scarlett, who along with his wife, Maggie, serves as finance co-chairman for the McCain-Palin campaign in Wyoming. “We only hope we have a place large enough to hold all the people who want to come.”
Invitations to the early-morning event will be sent out soon, and members of the public can request invitations by calling state GOP headquarters in Casper, party officials said.
Donors will have three opportunities to meet with Palin during her visit. A $2,500 donation pays for breakfast, a seat at a roundtable with Palin and a photo. A $1,000 donation pays for breakfast and a photo with Palin. A $250 donation pays for breakfast with the candidate.
The last paragraph is the reason why she’s headed to Jackson. $250 for breakfast is a little steep for our blood. Though, I’m sure worth every penny and if we had that many extra pennies just laying around, we’d go too.
Sphere: Related ContentFrom LifeNews.com. It appears Sarah’cuda and John McCain are continuing to make the pro-murder of unborn children groups tremble in fear:
Washington, DC (LifeNews.com) – Three pro-abortion groups are renewing their pledge to spend $30 million collectively bashing John McCain. The organizations upped their commitment to the attack ads and get-out-the-vote efforts with the addition of Alaska Governor Sarah Palin to McCain’s ticket.
NARAL, Planned Parenthood and Emily’s List are the long-time heavy hitters of the pro-abortion movement and they each previously announced multi-million dollar campaigns targeting the presidential election.
They told The Hill newspaper on Friday that voters can expect to see the effort roll out over the last 60 days of the election season.
“This is the most anti-choice ticket in history of the Republican Party,” NARAL Political Director Beth Shipp told the paper. “McCain put someone as outside the mainstream as you can on his ticket, which is Sarah Palin.” Click for entire story ….
UPDATE: On the same page.
Sphere: Related ContentThe Dissident Frogman has a tribute up.
Hats off to the Bush Administration for keeping us safe over the last seven years. Ann Coulter has an excellent column out this week.
Please, feel free to link to all 9/11 tributes in the comment section.
I would also like to honor my sister, Tereasa, who was killed in a car accident 17 years ago today. It amazes me how fast time flies by. My then 4 year old beautiful daughter, Tieki Rae, is now 21. (And still beautiful)
Sphere: Related ContentCan you guess who said it before clicking?
“She’s a smart, tough politician, so I think she’s going to be very formidable,”
Considering Biden does a terrific job at making himself look stupid all by himself, these debates could be very awkward and ugly, or hilarious, depending on your viewpoint. My viewpoint will be the latter.
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